It’s easy for Christians to fall into a rut: Church is a thing you do, prayer is a box to check, and faith seems far from “the real world.” This fall we let Jesus himself confront our ruts. “Do you believe this?” he asks (Jn. 11:26).
To believe in Jesus is to experience him. It’s more than logic, argument, and doctrine. It is intimate knowledge of God himself. This fall, let Jesus himself speak to you in his seven “I AM” statements in the gospel of John. How is he changing you? What response is he inspiring in you? To believe in him changes everything.
Invocation
In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
Ponder
Today we ponder the I AM statement: “I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved and will go in and out and find pasture.” Think about your favorite door – your house, your church, a favorite old building, etc. Ponder all the things that doors do – protect, guard, welcome into a home . . . . How is Jesus a door for you?
Word
John 20:25
“‘Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe.’”
Meditation: Doubt and Thomas by Koleen Barnes
Sometimes believing in the face of unbelief feels foolish. Feeling foolish is something I know I strive to avoid at all costs. No one wants to be the butt of the joke or the one on the outside. We have an almost deep-seated desire to be “in on it” and not left out. I see how Thomas fits into this passage and can almost feel his sense of being on the outside. His friends have gathered and told him that their savior, Jesus, who he saw die, is alive. How could someone with a logical mind believe that?
When Thomas sees Jesus, he is undoubtedly feeling this same sense of unease. The same feeling that our logical brains sometimes feel about our belief—that we are just “missing something.” You can feel him checking off the mental boxes to take him from the logical doubt of seeing his dead friend, very alive, in front of him and moving slowly toward belief. Thomas needs to see. He needs to feel and be 100% sure this is the man he knew before he will believe this story.
I have to make myself remember that Thomas was no stranger to seeing unbelievable things.
This wasn’t the first time he had seen someone rise from the dead. It wasn’t that he didn’t know he was supposed to believe it was happening. It was almost as if he couldn’t let himself believe it. His mind wouldn’t blindly follow his heart. This is also a feeling I know all too well.
I think about Thomas frequently. I can relate to a believer that still has questions and concerns about the sometimes very small light of belief in my heart. It frequently is at odds with the logic and reasoning in my brain. Sometimes I even feel like I have more doubt than belief.
When I am feeling this way, I always wonder if God instilled this “show me” attitude within Thomas specifically for me. Of course, he knew there would be doubt, so is he showing me Thomas on purpose? Is he saying, “See? You are not alone.”?
The passage even tells us that there are numerous more miracles, but this is the one that stuck and continues to be shared through God’s word. Doubt, and the journey to belief, is what survived.
Lord, thank you for loving me through my doubt and periods of unbelief. Thank you for showing me Thomas and reminding me that I am not alone. Stay with me as I strengthen my faith, and help me be reminded to fall back on you, and your word, in times when my belief feels small.
Prayer
Jesus, you said, “I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved and will go in and out and find pasture.” I often feel left outside, far from you. Bring me in. Welcome me into the home of your presence. Be my door, for you alone are my security. Amen.
Benediction
The Lord preserve us from all evil; the Lord preserve our souls. The Lord preserve our going out and our coming in, from this time forth, and even forevermore. Amen. (Ps. 121:7-8)